brothers

Photos in the Corn Pit at Ganyard Hill Farm

In case you thought it was all hunky dory in siblinghood in our house, let me assure you that we have the full range of human emotion going on here. 

"So many wonderful teaching moments and so much opportunity to practice my patience and compassion!" I say to myself on days that I've had my full quota of sleep and on days that everything else is going smoothly.  There are many days that are so wonderful, with only the occasional trip-up, that I forget about the other days.

Then there are those other days. The "I think none of us are going to survive this and I'm clearly ruining my children for life" days. I'm sure you've had them, too. Yesterday was one of those days.

Thankfully, a new day has dawned, as has my resolution to make forging loving relationships a priority in our home. Yes, I have a willful two year-old. This too shall pass? But it's more my attitude that needs to change. I think I need to apply some of my hard-learned lessons about feeding to sibling interactions as well. I need to see it as an opportunity to model and guide loving behavior rather than a problem to be fixed. Because, truly, are interpersonal interactions ever perfect? No- it's a life-long dance that we must learn, changing moves, rhythms, and partners. An evolving, moving art form. Some people are gifted, sure - but most of us learn through lessons, mistakes, and lots of practice. 

A few books are on my side table now as re-commit myself to loving discipline:

Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline is an old favorite of mine from my time as a Montessori teacher. It's time to bring it out again now that Finn is older and Lachlan is becoming much more of a participant in his life, wanting to touch everything, put everyting in his mouth ... which is disconcerting to Finn.

Healing Stories for Challenging Behaviour is a new-to-me book about intuitive storytelling - a parenting practice that is both effective and creatively engaging. It's full of stories that address a full spectrum of common behaviors (difficulty sharing, hitting, whining, dishonesty, etc.). The wonderful thing about this book is that it also guides the parent in the art of weaving a unique story to address a specific child and his/her needs. Finn has always responded very positively to our made-up stories (for bedtime and car-rides) so I'm really looking forward to reading it in more depth.